Q&A With Kevin: One Year of Marriage

Hey guys! Today’s post is a super special addition because today is mine and Kevin’s one year anniversary! I seriously cannot believe we have been married for one whole year. It has most definitely flown by. Some of you may be confused because we did just have our wedding back in September, but we actually got “courthouse married” on February 24, 2017. We found out at the beginning of the year that Kevin was going to have to deploy in May, and he wanted to make sure I would have everything I needed while he was gone (insurance, access to the base, etc). At first I was a little unsure about getting married without the dress and the flowers. I was worried our actual wedding day wouldn’t be as special if we were already married. But I decided it was for the best. As it turned out, it didn’t make our big wedding day any less special at all. It made it much easier and stress free! And it worked out really well that we were already legally married because our pastor got sick the day of the wedding, and Kevin’s dad had to perform the ceremony! Surprisingly to Kevin, and probably everyone else, I didn’t freak out at all. Having Kevin’s dad perform the ceremony made it that much more special. ANYWAY. I really wanted this post to be a little glimpse into what the first year of marriage looks like (for a military couple and otherwise). So I sent hubby some questions all the way to Afghanistan (thank you, technology!) about his thoughts on year one of marriage and I’m sharing his answers below!

Q: What has been the most surprising part of marriage?

A: The most surprising thing is that we can be happy just spending a lazy Saturday watching TV and taking a nap and both of us consider it totally worth it!

Q: What has been the most fun part of married life?

A: The most fun thing is traveling together, whether that’s to the next town over or Oklahoma or international! I never get tired of it.

Q: What has been the easiest part of marriage?

A: The easiest has been the simple day to day integration of our schedules (when I’m home).

Q: What has been the hardest?

A: The hardest has honestly been trying to do the same with a 10.5 hour time zone difference. It makes communication difficult.

Q: What have you learned about yourself in the last year?

A: I’ve learned I’m very set in my ways and it takes me some time to get used to changing them. We are both very similar in that respect but we are getting better about it!

Q: What has been your favorite part of marriage?

A: My favorite part is always having my best friend to talk to and come home to. Nothing compares to the companionship and love I am constantly surrounded by.

Q: As a military couple, how is marriage different than that of a normal couple?

A: As a military couple, in my humble opinion, it is much harder because of the unique challenges we face compared to a civilian couple. We have multiple month deployments where we have to spend apart with limited communication and even week long TDY’s (temporary duties) where I’ll be gone and leave you at home to hold down the fort.

Q: What unique challenges do we face as a military couple?

A: Along with deployments and TDY’s, we have to deal with PCS’s (permanent change of station) where we may have to pick up and move everything to another base (potentially internationally) and grow roots every 4 years or so.

Q: What effects has deployment had on your first year of marriage? 

A: Deployment is a roller coaster. Sometimes it’s hard to be positive but I always try to be, especially when either of us are having a bad day/week. It’s definitely making us stronger in communication but that doesn’t mean we communicate perfectly all the time.

Q: Is marriage what you expected?

A: Some parts I expected, and other parts of it have been unexpected but in a good way. I learn more about you every day and we grow and adjust to life as the Air Force sends us where it wills with limited input from ourselves.

Q: What are you most excited about in the coming months/years?

A: In the coming months I’m most excited about coming home from deployment and just taking time off to spend with you to make up for being gone so long. In the coming years I’m most excited to see where your awesome blog goes and how it develops! {Hayley inserts eye roll}

Q: What is your favorite memory from the last year?

A: My favorite memory besides the wedding is definitely the honeymoon: I love traveling, and getting to do that with my best friend and wife is the best experience. I love going on adventures together, whether that’s road trips, vacation, etc.

Q: What is your ideal date night as a married man? Has it changed from when you were dating?

A: My ideal date night as a married man is roughly the same as it was before. I love cooking dinner at home and trying new recipes, followed by watching a movie on the couch curled up together. It’s different in that even if that’s all we do I’m still content. When we were dating I was more concerned with where we were going to go, how I looked. There is less pressure to make a good impression lol.

Q: What has been the biggest adjustment going from being single to married?

A: The biggest adjustment has got to be getting accustomed to receiving input before doing things. I’m so used to making decisions on my own that sometimes I make up my mind without getting advice and talking things through. I’m working on it though.

Q: What are you most looking forward to about coming home?

A: I most look forward to coming home and just relaxing with you. Especially after being gone so long, I want to get adjusted to living a normal life again. It’s a lot easier to show someone your affection in person than it is over the phone thousands of miles away, and I think I took that for granted a little before I left.

Q: What advice would you give someone who is about to be engaged or married?

A: My advice, whether it’s a military couple or not, is to be open and honest. Communicate as best you can and never let disagreements linger. It’s okay to disagree every now and then, but I’m a big proponent of never going to sleep upset. Learn from your mistakes and take action to avoid them in the future. Despite what some people believe, we’re not perfect people and even if you think you’ve got the perfect marriage there is always something you can be doing or learning to make it better. Contentment can lead to complacency, miscommunication, and ultimately is the breeding ground for laziness so I think as long as you are always striving to show your partner how much you love them, you’ll run into less issues 10 or 20 years down the road.

Q: Where do you see us in 10 years?

A: In ten years, I see us continuing to enjoy life and maybe a little one running around trying to figure out parenting together!

Outfit 1 Details: Short Sleeve Button Down (similar) | Jeans | Booties (similar)

Outfit 2 Details: Maxi Romper (similar) | Block Heel Sandals | Sweater (similar)

Outfit 3 Details: Lace Top (similar) | Skirt | Block Heel Sandals

Have a great weekend y’all!

xo Hayley