So this is one of those posts that I’ve been meaning to write for the new year, but have put off. I think it’s because I wasn’t really ready to write it + I’ve had zero desire to work on time intensive blog posts since we’ve been in South Carolina. What can I say, it’s been a rough two and a half weeks, guys.
In keeping with the theme of the week, and bettering myself in 2019, I wanted to talk a little bit about resolutions and goal setting. Well, I’ve never been big on either haha. I’ve always thought they seemed kind of pointless. I’m more of a right-here-right-now, we’ll see what tomorrow looks like when it gets here kind of person. Because today is really all we have, right? The kind of person who loves a physical planner to stay on track daily, but not one who actively plans out an entire year. Without making “resolutions” or setting big goals for the year, I decided it was time to make some changes. Instead, I wanted to come up with a mantra or words to live by. Things that I could really focus on to make this year great regardless of circumstance.
Let’s back up first.
As a lot of you know, 2018 was a weird one for me. My husband spent four months in Afghanistan while I was back in Little Rock struggling through work everyday, extremely unhappy. So I quit. Yep. You can read more about that here, but it was for my own sanity. Quitting that job truly was so much of what I needed. I got to work on the blog full time, which came with struggles of its own, but I was definitely happier.
Lately I’ve been feeling not quite like myself. Not that I ever really was the same after that job. But it’s been even more noticeable since we’ve had to pick up and move at the beginning of the year. I’ve felt as if all of those negative characteristics were creeping back into my life: negativity about life situations, inability to stay focused, lack of trust in others, lack of confidence in myself, losing sight of my purpose. I know, that’s a lot. But what kind of blogger…what kind of human am I if I don’t share the ugly with you guys too?
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My Words for 2019
Ok, so I came up with not one, not two, but four words that I really want to focus on daily. I truly believe that if I stay focused on improving these areas of my life, it can be the best year yet. My words to live by in 2019: Intention. Purpose. Prayer. Joy.
Intention
Ever feel like you’re kind of all over the place with how you spend your time, or that you aren’t spending your time wisely? SAME HERE. This has been a big one for me the last couple of weeks. When I first started working from home, it was an issue then too, because guys, working from home is HARD. But I eventually got into a great routine where I felt productive. After moving, everything kind of reset for some reason, and I’ve just felt off lately. I can’t complete a single task without spacing out or getting up and starting another one.
It’s made me stop and think: why am I having such a hard time with this? And I think it’s because 1. I manage to convince myself that with Kevin’s work schedule “I’ll have time for this later.” (Of course later never comes.) And 2. I’ve lost my Why. So I’ve decided it’s time to be more intentional. What exactly does that look like for me?
Being intentional with my time
One of the biggest challenges for me right now is waking up early. I want to start getting up and being productive, so at 3:30 when Kevin gets home, I can power down for the day. I would love to be able to spend more time with him where I’m not writing, thinking about what I should be writing, or scrolling through social media. This is also going to require utilizing my planner more daily so that I stay on track and don’t get distracted.
Being intentional with what I buy
Who else shops when they’re bored? Just me? I will say I’ve gotten much better about how I spend my money, but this is still something I want to improve on. Several months back, I wrote a post on creating an intentional wardrobe, and this year I want to truly focus on living with less.
Being Intentional with what I post on Instagram and the blog
This is a huge one for me. Instead of posting daily on Instagram for the sake of posting, I really want to focus on who I’m talking to and what I’m saying. I want every post to be carefully thought out so that it serves a purpose in someone’s life other than just telling them they need to buy that sweater. I want people to leave my blog feeling like they learned something or were encouraged, while also being inspired by style. Also, I want to be intentional with the products I promote. I want to feel comfortable saying no to brands that don’t suit my audience and confident reaching out and saying yes to the ones that do.
Purpose
As I mentioned, I feel like I lost my Why for the blog at some point over the last few months. At first it was all about having a place to be creative, share my love for style, and encourage other women. The blog was meant to be something to call my own no matter how many times military life moved us around the world. Working from home sounds like a dream until you start to feel guilty for not bringing in a consistent paycheck. Then it just becomes stressful. Kevin couldn’t care less, but it’s a pride thing for me. So at a certain point, I tried to make the blog about making money, and I forgot why I started. So, one of my main focuses this year is going to be to remember my purpose behind starting Style Worthy and let that be my motivation every day.
Joy
Several years ago at a Disciple Now with my church back home, we were taught one of those lessons that never really leaves. Ya know what I mean? Like you can remember what you were wearing, where you were sitting, and that the truth of it rocked your world. The lesson was that happiness does not equal Joy. Happiness is situational; Joy is not. You can be unhappy or go through a hard time without losing the Joy you have in Jesus. The Joy you have in knowing that in the end, God’s plan is so much better than ours.
Well, sadly, I lost that last year too. I let situations and circumstances get the best of me, and I let negativity and fear take over almost every aspect of my life from deployments and the blog to my self confidence. Then I let comparison steal what was left. This year, I’m choosing to find Joy in all the things, big and small: our marriage, the blog, military life situations, my body, fashion, etc. What are you choosing to find Joy in this year?
Prayer
This one might be the most important, because without it, the other three words don’t mean much. It’s my hope that in 2019, every situation I face will be met with prayer. Some of my biggest prayers this year are that God will be at the center of our marriage. That He will guide the blog in the direction He wants it to go. That my idea of success is realigned. That my identity is found in Christ and not my career path. And that I have patience with myself and God’s plan for me this year.
I know this was a long one but I felt like I needed to write it. I hope that you found a little bit of encouragement and inspiration from it, and if nothing else you know you aren’t alone in your struggles.
The Outfit
There isn’t much better than an oversized sweater this time of year. Sometimes you just don’t feel like layering on all the things to stay warm, and with this striped sweater from Chicwish, you won’t have to. It is probably the warmest top I own, and the turtleneck could cover your entire face if you needed it to haha. OH an it’s currently on sale for $49 (originally $79)! It isn’t itchy at all, and it pairs well with leggings or your favorite jeans. You can even dress it up with a cute little skirt and over the knee boots if you wanted. Wearing a size S-M.
Here I chose to pair it with my favorite hiking boots that are equally as warm and cozy. These boots look so expensive in my opinion, but they’re actually just under $60 from H&M and they are amazing. I loved to add a tall boot sock with these to create a barrier between the boot and leggings + it adds another layer of warmth. I’m wearing a size 8, which is my normal boot size.
If you made it all the way through this post, I really appreciate you sticking with me. It was a hard one to write, but I really felt that I needed to. And I felt there had to be someone out there that needed to hear it too. If New Years resolutions and goal making aren’t for you, I highly encourage you to choose a few words to live by this year. Having something to fall back on when you lose your Why in life is so important. What would your words to live by be for this year? Let me know in the comments, I’d love to hear them!
xo
Hayley